let’s get real.

I feel I need to write a post about the current situation in Israel, but I believe the life I am living in Israel at this current moment is faaaarrrr from the life you think I’m living regarding the news you’re watching at home.  Thank G-d it is relatively quite, and dare I say peaceful, where I live.

I want you to know that I am safe, and grateful for the e-mails I have received from many of you.  I am constantly praying for peace, and sending love into the universe, as the only thing I can do in my current situation is the aforementioned.  I am proud to be an Israeli, and I am constantly inspired and in awe of the men and women who are serving to defend this country, I so proudly call my home.

On a completely different note, this blog is about to show you a different side to me.  A side that is rather, pissed off.  Here I am, in the dating world, open to shidduchim (matchmaking), and something happened that has happened to me before, and pissed me off then, too.

This woman tells me she has someone she thinks I’ll be a good match with and then tells me to wear my wig when I meet him.  She goes on to list the reasons I’ve heard hundreds of times before, “first impressions are everything..you’re beautiful, but it might be hard for the guy to see that at first…yada yada yada” I’ve heard it all before.

You can't have a bad hair day, without hair #gratitude
You can’t have a bad hair day, without hair #gratitude

Hold up – put yourself in my shoes…don’t you think if I thought the only reason I wasn’t currently dating someone was because of my hair, that I would CHOOSE to cover it without anyone telling me to??  Thank G-d my hair is currently growing back, (black and white), and I feel more grateful than ever that my hair is growing in.  Some days I wear scarfs, and most days I stand tall and smile at the art Hashem is designing on my head.

In a world where EVERYONE is so busy trying to fit in, Hashem is SCREAMING at me to stand out…and now, because I don’t have a man, I should cover up?  It’s rather amazing, hair is SUCH an accessory, people don’t realize that when you have no hair, others are FORCED to look me in the eye.  They are also, (maybe without them knowing), instantly showing me their sense of character…is the person I’m talking to bold enough to be forward and ask me what’s up with my hair?  Are they going to tell me how sorry they are I have cancer (G-d forbid!)??(Something that happens more often than you could imagine)…the way people respond to my hair, leads me down the path of whether or not I want to move forward with the relationship.

That’s right…I get to decide if I want to continue with you, based on how you treat me…I’m not going to let you decide how you treat me, covered up, when on our next date I have to anticipate how you will respond seeing the true me.

I am who I am.  I am woman.  I am beautiful.  I am strong.  And I am open to love.

So to my love – I know you’re out there: Please be awesome.  Please be caring.  Please be bold.  PLEASE see me for who I am, and not for the temporary “bad hair day” I’ve been having for the last few years :).  Please love me unconditionally, as I am so ready to love you, for being YOU.

I love you all – thanks for letting me vent 🙂



4 thoughts on “let’s get real.

  1. To my Chanaleh…. you ARE a beautiful, strong, and amazing woman who continues to inspire me by your unbelieveable spirit and sense of self. I love you SO much and am so proud of this blog you wrote! You go girl! Everything you said was so well put and I am so glad you put it out there in the universe (as you would say). I love you… Mommy


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